Party {Heart}y

Throwing a party.  A shindig.  A get-together.  A celebration.  It's one of my most. favorite. things.  EVER.  I just love to make people feel special and to celebrate any occasion (or none at all!).

And what better occasion than to help prepare for your new (and first) nephew?!?!  Yes, I finally get to become an actual auntie.  I've been a pseudo-auntie for quite some time now, and now there will be a new little in my own extended family!  Yay!  

Meet my sister-in-love, Heidi.

Photo from October 2012

We feel like we go way back (and we kinda sorta do, but not really.  I PROMISE I didn't hate you when we worked together!).  We see eye-to-eye on a lot of things.  And we tell each other when we need a "you-ARE-actually-being-crazy-this-time" attitude check.

We have a few of these "laughing-while-trying-to-take-a-darn-selfie" photos

Well, she and my brother-in-love, Ryan, are expecting their first baby...a little boy! 

It's a boy!

They've named him Owen and we can't wait to meet him (just keep cookin', little buddy!).  It was my honor to throw her first baby shower ever (for our husbands' side of the family, of course...these boys are such brothers).  And you all know I like big celebrations.

CELEBRATE!

My GO BIG OR GO HOME motto for celebrating life events is somewhat well-known, if you know me.  And don't forget...it's not about spending money on being extravagant, but using forethought, planning, and some creative thinking to make it special (and staying up until 2am to finish making decorations while obsessing over the menu - more coffee, please). 

Deciding on the theme was easy...she's a book lover and appreciates all things vintage.  Voila!  A vintage, library-inspired party!

O is for Owen

I had some old books to begin with and knew I needed some to stack for displays and some to rip apart and use for some of the projects I had planned (how to choose the ones to rip up?  Harder than I thought!).  And thanks to my "seester," (thanks, Lex!!!!!) my supply more than doubled with a thrift store trip and a purge of her own books.  I had book page mobiles, pinwheels, and garlands planned (oh, Pinterest, how do I love thee?).  With a little lot of time and effort, it all came together in time (and getting your house clean for the arrival of guests is always an added bonus)!

A wall of pinwheels...

A few book page mobiles for hanging...

...and a "rolodex-style" folded book to hold "library card" notes for Owen!

The pinwheel wall?  I think it's my favorite.  My favorite.  Almost as much as coffee.  Some paper, tiny brads, and a fresh pack of sticky tack did the trick (because who wants to fill freshly-painted walls with new holes?)!  And it still holds (I can't bring myself to take it down - I'm still enjoying it too much!).

Pinwheels, books, and baby pictures, "O Baby!"

The menu included Chinese Chicken Salad (thanks, Costco!), Seven Superfood Salad (thanks, times two), Caprese Salad Cups, Cheese and Crackers, and Wonton Cups with Strawberries, topped with an Orange-Coconut Cream (which I enjoyed as coffee topping for 3 additional days).  Yummers.

Thanks, Ed, for holding all the food!

Caprese - Mmmmm....our favorite!

The Wonton Cups with Strawberries!

Dessert?  Lemon Mousse Cups with Raspberry Preserves and (by demand request) Lemon Sugar Cookies with Royal Icing (to resemble alphabet blocks, of course!).  

Lemon Mousse - easiest "recipe" ever!

Lemon Sugar Cookies - a double batch is a must.  NO.  JOKE.

A marquee light - why not?

When the weather is nice enough, we like to utilize the patio for our parties.  We set up a cute little outdoor living room (complete with mismatched chairs).

Outdoor living rooms are always a good idea.

This banner and mobile were made of book pages and paint chips (and sweetly swayed in the breeze).

And no party is complete without an appropriately-coordinating chalkboard...

#freshchalk

...or TWO.

More #freshchalk.  I love this quote.

A sweet, vintage vignette.

This table was purely for decor purposes.  Sometimes, you just need those.

For favors, I made these cute little book page and glitter ribbon clothespins.  And yes, that's a font called "1948" - I didn't actually use a typewriter (though, you shouldn't put it past me).

We visited, we ate, we played, and we "showered with blessings."  

Match the quote to the children's book title...harder than we thought!

The highly-coveted Paisley Sprouts clutch...Alli, she laughed.  Really hard.

Even the younger ladies had a wonderful time.  

Then, those of us left afterwards sacked out on the sofa, with the windows open, the leftovers available for eating, and our comfy pants on (BYCF - Bring Your Comfy Pants!).

Sweet little Owen, we are so excited to meet you!  Finish baking up like the perfectly golden lemon sugar cookies your mom hoards loves so much.  You'll be here before we know it!  You have some crazy excited cousins and aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas praying for you!  We love you so much!!!

Love,

Your {Favorite} Auntie

National Wear Red Day!

My sweetie, sporting her RED for CHD Awareness week!

Congenital Heart Defect/Disease Awareness Week begins today!  Educate yourself about this widely-unknown subject.  1 in about 110 babies are born with a CHD, and to most, it's a surprise.  CHD's are the #1 birth defect...and about 40,000 babies are born every year with a CHD (statistics taken from Mended Little Hearts).  SO MANY of these go undetected, unnoticed, with no outward symptoms right away.  We were blessed with an excellent doctor who detected it on ultrasound...but many parents don't have this luxury and it comes as a complete surprise to them when they hear that their newly-born precious baby has a problem.  

Be educated this week and share to spread awareness!!  And wear that red!

One Of The Greatest Gifts

Being a parent has taught me a lot.  And no, I don't feel any wiser for it (at least not yet!).  Do you know what being a parent has taught me?

That I'm selfish.

That I can have a short temper.

That my words are not always seasoned with salt.

That I am easily frustrated or irritable.

That my life still needs a lot of work.  Not work that I can do alone.  Work that I need to allow God to do within me.  Work that can only be done by surrendering my will to His.

My children have taught me lesson after lesson about grace.  Forgiveness.  Love.  (Kids grant grace and forgiveness so much faster, sometimes, it seems).  Embracing each day and treasuring it as a gift.  I don't always do that, of course (remember all that work that still needs to be done?), but it's certainly a daily goal.

Nightly reading time together

Grace.  Being given the gift of something we don't deserve.  The ultimate example of that is Christ, and as Christians, it's a behavior we are called to imitate.  

All too often, we are judgmental, wanting people to get what they deserve, seeking justice, holding others to a standard that may be unrealistic (I know I'm sure guilty).  But that isn't how God chooses to treat us.  Oftentimes, we are so ready to judge others, but when it's our turn, we're all about asking for forgiveness...expecting it, even.  But one of the best gifts we have to offer to others is grace.

We don't know the struggles that a stranger (even a friend or acquaintance) may be dealing with.  We dramaticize or magnify our own issues and minimize those of others.  Rather than being sympathetic, we turn our trials into a competition because "they don't know what it's like for us," "how could they understand," or "they've never been in our shoes."  Rather than judging and criticizing each other, we should be granting grace.  It's what God does for us, even though it's clear that we don't deserve it.

You see...that's the whole point of grace.  It isn't dependent upon a person's worthiness (we would all desperately fail), circumstances, or desires.  In fact, a call to grace isn't dependent upon the other person at all.

Our call to grant grace to others is about us, and the choice that we make.

It's the choice to get off of our soap boxes, to withhold judgement and criticism, and to give them the benefit of the doubt.  It's the choice...the gift...to show others Christ's love, the way he did for us.  

"We love because He first loved us."

~1 John 4:19

He doesn't love us because we deserve it.  He doesn't love us because we earned it.  Nor does He loves us because we loved Him first. We are to love as a result of His love for us.  Because He set the first example of true love, our love should imitate His love.  We love our own children because they are our children.  We don't love them because they are capable of showing love to us right away.  We love them for who they are.  

"See what kind of love the Father has given to us,

that we should be called children of God;

and so we are..."

~ 1 John 3:1

Love and grace go hand-in-hand.  Grace flows from a loving heart.  We didn't earn it from Him...and we can't expect others to earn it from us.  None of us deserves it (and it isn't for us to determine that, anyway).  That's why it's a gift.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. 
And this is not your own doing; 
it is the gift of God,
not a result of works,
so that no one may boast." 

~ Ephesians 2:8-9

"Just because" flowers

The gift of God.  Sometimes, because we love our children, we do something nice for them. Even when attitudes are poor, respectfulness is lacking, and obedience has been thrown out the window.  Clearly, it's not my first instinct to give them a "gift" under such circumstances, but occasionally, it's what's needed the most...not because they've earned it, but simply because we love them.

Granting grace isn't easy.  It goes against our human nature.  But it is what we are called to do.  Next time I feel the urge to judge or criticize someone, anyone, family, friend, stranger...even foe, I will try with all my might to remember how grateful I am for the grace that I have been granted, and try to do the same.  Let's toss judgement and criticism of each other out the window...and instead...

"Grace be with all who love our Lord Jesus Christ

with love incorruptible."

~ Ephesians 6:24

{Hidden}

Oftentimes, while I work on things with my hands, I think about God's word.  Recently, I pondered some things while finishing up an Etsy order (do you do that, too?).  My fingers can stitch away and my mind can wander...and dwell on God's truth...as well as how I can better apply His words.

The back of a hoop

This?  It looks like a jumbled mess.  Threads everywhere.  Knots.  Tangles.  Nonsensical.  Just like our lives.  Sometimes we can be a little bit "all over the place."  We let things get to us and we get "knotted up" inside, stubborn, even.  Sometimes, we get so tangled up in our sinful natures that we let it control our actions.  Many other times, life just plain doesn't make sense and we are left dumbfounded.  

Life is messy.  It's a tangled mess of daily trials, some within our control (and of our own doing), and some outside of our control.  It's the simple result of sin entering the world shortly after time began. Though we may try to fix what we can, our "bandaids" are only temporary.  

We try to put our "best selves" out there, but behind the scenes doesn't always (or usually) match with what we let others see.  We often only want others to see our good sides.  But that isn't real.  Each of us is imperfect in some way, differently from others.  In this "Perfectly Pinterest Age," we see what others want us to see...we can easily try measuring ourselves up to the standard that we have created from what we see.  The things we lack personally are good qualities in others.  But we have each been lovingly and uniquely handcrafted.  

And we have been offered the gift of redemption.  A new life.  A distinct purpose.  

Colossians 3:3

Society tells us to "put ourselves out there."  God's word tells us to deny ourselves and live for Christ.

Society tells us to "climb the corporate ladder" and that "bigger is better."  God's word tells us that He must increase, but we must decrease.

Society says, "put your best foot forward."  God's word tells us that no one is good.

Our striving is in vain when living our lives for ourselves.  But when we have been redeemed in Christ, everything changes.  Our aim is no longer to run the rate race, to strive for earthly perfection, or to store up "treasures on earth."  

Our purpose is to glorify God.  Our lives are now "hidden with Christ."  Our desire for what the world now sees from us shifts from our "best selves" to a life that is undeniably lived to glorify the Holy Creator.  We aim not to have people see us at all, but Christ.  He clothes us in our "new selves" that are purely to be a reflection of Him.  And our earthly trials also take on new meaning.  No longer are they just about "something outside of our own control," but how God desires to use them...in us, as well as for others.  It's definitely something we have been learning since having Camdyn...and ALL that it entailed for us then, AND now.  We no longer have to waffle between decisions to make the "right" one because our job is to take a backseat to our own motives and desires and let God's work flow through us...without being an obstacle to His good and perfect will.  

The hoop's front, messiness all covered.

He will cover us in redemption from the death of His Son and make something beautiful and perfect for His purpose...if we surrender our will to His.

Lord, please hide me so others have no choice but to see You.

The Heart Of It All

The six-month mark of Camdyn's Fontan came and went before we could barely blink.  It's not that we had forgotten or didn't want to recognize it somehow, but that this thing we call "life" got so busy we were tied up with the "ins and outs" of the daily routines.  School, work, Etsy Shop, a couple rounds of mild illnesses amongst each of us, plans, appointments, trying with all our might to put Christmas cheer up in our home for our littles to enjoy.  Then there was this surprise trip to a magical place coined as the "Happiest Place On Earth."  We were busy, crazy busy...but also blessed busy.  Busy with all those things we had the luxury to accomplish or enjoy.

My, how our lives had changed again in six months.  We began 2013 hopeful and faithful, but also unsure, and dreading the summer.  We went from normal day-to-day life in January to planned hospital life by June, and post-hospital day-to-day life again in July.  Now, at the end of 2013, it seems as though our Big Red Heart Days were so long ago, yet, returning for her "mild" heart surgery yesterday (though it seems strange to say it, at least it was not open or complicated), it seemed, still, like we had barely left.

It happens sometimes.  We forget to see the big picture because we are caught up in the minutiae (or is that just me?).  No matter how hard I may try, sometimes I briefly forget the emotions that were so real to us during that time...and yet, I still cannot peruse our pictures or blog posts from the last 8 months without feeling the wave of emotions all over again.  The minutiae.  Seemingly inconsequential.  We are ever so thankful for those.  But sometimes, it takes work to remember the bigger picture (enter: tunnel vision), and just what (read: Who) is at the heart of it all.  God is steadfastingly faithful.  He always has been...but we were given the opportunity to test our faith this year, and to see His faithfulness come to pass.  God.  He's at the center.  He was with us at her appointments, He was with her on the playground.  He was there around our dinner table, He was with us during cuddle time.  He stood with us in the waiting room, and covered her with protection in the operating room.  He calmed our nerves during recovery...and when she went back to school.  And then, He was with us everywhere in between.

It's not that He was at the heart of it all, but that He is the heart of it all.  If nothing else, this year has been an exercise in proper focus.  Not focusing on the details, the questions, the uncertainties, but on Him.  The less we focus on Him, the more time and energy we have to allow our focus to shift out of place, away from where it should be.  In turn, keeping our focus on Him removes the opportunity for all the things outside of our control to occupy our minds...which keeps worry and anxiety at bay.

Oswald Chambers (I couldn't locate the original source)

I wouldn't hesitate to say that 2013 was our most trying year yet, or our most blessed.  Out of all those trials and valleys, we found our blessings.  It's like the quote by GK Chesterson that says, "Without the rain, there would be no rainbow."

Camdyn & Max after her pre-surgery physical on Monday, and Camdyn post-surgery on Tuesday

And when I look at the big picture in conjunction with recognizing the little triumphs, my heart overflows with gratitude...which is the best way to close out 2013, and begin 2014...and being able to do so is a blessing in itself.

Walking the hall in Explorer on Tuesday night, and a stop at the big red heart before heading home Wednesday!

Happy New Year, friends!  May your blessings be multiplied in 2014 and your focus on Him steadfast.

2013: Going Out With A Bang

A couple of final Big Red Heart Days for 2013 are on our agenda.  That's how we're spending New Year's Eve and Day...living it up at the hospital!!  After open-heart surgery, sometimes, when the chest heals up, the wires used to close the chest cavity can come close to the surface of the skin, and even puncture it from the inside.  Since September, Camdyn has had a noticeable one that has become bothersome (pokes her from the inside when she leans a certain way).  X-ray discovered that there are two that are protruding, so she'll have a little surgery Tuesday morning (bright and early...yawn) to have them removed.  It's a simple procedure, small incisions, but also lab work, anesthesia, and an IV will be involved.

My Sweet Pea is looking so grown up, these days.

Would you please pray for my sweet pea?  She's nervous and scared (understandably) and would really appreciate it (as will we)!  Thanks, friends!  Your love and support this year have been off-the-charts incredible.

On Thanks and Giving

The last fall leaf will soon be falling from my favorite tree in our yard.  The leaves that have already fallen have yet to see a rake this season.  We enjoy the "messiness" of our yard in the fall.  Something about it is so serene, so quintessentially right (though the strangers who keep coming to the door and asking if we want them to clean our yard for a small fee would potentially disagree).   Fall stirs something up within us that no other season does.  It could be the fact that the air is finally fresh again after the first rain or two...it could be that the season unfolds before us so rapidly that if we blink too long we miss it...or that the cooler temperatures breed the desire for cozying up under blankets with our little loves and a hot drink.

Fall sings to our souls.

And to close out the all-too-short fall season is my favorite holiday...Thanksgiving.   I love enjoying a meal around the table with loved ones.  I love the smells that waft from the kitchen throughout the rest of the house that say "something delicious is coming."  I love teaching our children about gratitude and hearing what Camdyn is thankful for.  Most recently?  She listed off Jesus, shoes, her bed, and her mommy.  With the exception of a Daddy or Max mention, I'd say that's a pretty accurate list.  It's the simple things.  And we have so much more to be thankful for again this year.  After such a big summer, in a way, we began celebrating Thanksgiving in June! We are thankful for health, for a life that sometimes, some might call "boring," for our growing littles, for sharing the season with people we love.  We are thankful for the times that God tell us to just wait, to wait on Him for direction, for an answer, no matter how long that may be...because we are also thankful for His sovereignty.  Over everything.

I was at the store the other day picking up a couple of grocery essentials.  While I was standing in line, there was a woman a few people ahead of me who was speaking to the cashier about Thanksgiving.  As she was putting her bagged groceries in the cart, she said that she really didn't "celebrate Thanksgiving at all, anyway."  She said that she really only liked it "for the food," then proceeded to list off all the food she wanted to eat over the holiday.

Really?  I thought to myself.  It just sounded so pointless and sad.

But unfortunately, it makes sense.  We live in a time where Halloween gets more "screen time" than Thanksgiving.  Where we are unwillingly catapulted from the end of Halloween straight into Christmas...but not real Christmas.  Commercialized Christmas.  They are two very different things.  We see commercials for Black Friday specials left and right...and now "Brown Thursday?"  Stores opening specifically on Thanksgiving night because they want to draw crowds of people who want to get a jump start on their "Christmas" shopping.  Why can't we just have a few solid hours to really celebrate Thanksgiving...without rushing out the doors to catch the latest steal of a deal?  And where are all the Thanksgiving decorations?  They were quickly replaced with all things Christmas immediately following Halloween.

But why?

I have no problem with the idea of Black Friday...I love a good bargain as much as the next person.  I love to get the most "bang for my buck" when shopping for loved ones.  But when did Thanksgiving become about shopping specials?

Our pastor said it right yesterday when he said that it doesn't make any sense to "give thanks" if you aren't expressing that gratitude to someone in particular.  It would be senseless to give thanks to the universe for what some would consider a "cosmic accident."  So what option does that leave?

I remember old song lyrics from my childhood:

Give thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the Holy One,
Give thanks because He's given Jesus Christ, His son.

And now let the weak say, "I am strong,"
Let the poor say, "I am rich,
Because of what the Lord has done for us,"

Give thanks

So that's what we do.  We give thanks to God with our grateful hearts for all the ways He has worked in our lives..for the things that are really big, like making Camdyn healthy again this year and keeping our baby boy perfectly healthy.  And we give thanks for the things that seem small, like fresh socks to wear, food on the table, piles of laundry left over after a super fun surprise trip to Disneyland (post with photos coming soon!).

But we can do more than simply give thanks.  We can give ourselves, our entire beings, to God.  It's what He wants from us.  It's all we can give to Him.  We can give him ourselves without withholding anything from Him.  It's no easy thing, especially when we firmly believe we have something to offer and that we can do this thing called "life" all by ourselves.  He doesn't want part of us.  He doesn't want the day's leftovers from us.  He doesn't want us for the things we would consider our talents or skills.  He doesn't want us for the good things we do or say.

He just wants us. 

The good, the bad, and the ugly, if you will.  The moment we start thinking we have something to offer Him, we don't.  He will use every ounce of us in ways that we would never consider.  He used Moses to speak, though he was unskilled in speech.  He used a small boy named David to defeat a giant.  He used the apostle Paul, who, before his conversion, persecuted and threatened murder to those who proclaimed Jesus as Lord.

And He can use us, too...but only if we give ourselves to Him.  That's the "giving" part of Thanksgiving to me.  We offer our thanks to God for all that He has done for us, given to us, and has yet to do.  He is full of grace...the "unmerited favor" that none of us deserve, but that we all receive when we turn to Christ.  And in turn, we are to offer ourselves to Him.

Unrestrained.

Without argument.

Unhindered.

Completely.

Not "Ananias and Sapphira-style."  But ALL of us.  Each part.  Every last bit.

That's Thanksgiving.  May yours be filled with heartfelt thanks and family, while giving Him the best offering you have.